ianbee: this is instead of getting a dog

Happy news

This is good isn't it?

And this too, but obviously not in the same league. It's going to be good to have an assistant that won't fall in love with the doctor. Can't take anymore of that! Oh the tears and the weeping ...

And on first glance I thought this is too controversial, but I actually feel quite good about it and think it's an amazing gift from a mother.

Nice to have happy news in amongst all the scary stuff. Speaking of scary stuff, there's already a website dedicated to the baggage handler who tackled the bombers in Glasgow. Tackling terrorism with humour, it's the British way.

As thousands of Glaswegians queued, moaned ... on a rainy Saturday afternoon, one man stood vigilant outside the airport terminal. Baggage supervisor, hero, smoker. John Smeaton.

Little did he know, as he happily dragged on his fag, that two crazed al-Qaeda operatives were preparing to meet their maker. But they didn’t meet their maker. Instead they met BAA’s answer to Jack Bauer.

Those hapless al-Qaeda boys were to find out that Glasgow has no respect for international terrorism. Nobody gets between 10,000 Weegies and a £99 week in Ibiza booked on Thursday night through Barrhead Travel.

I don't normally have rude words in this blog. But I have made an exception because this cartoon perfectly sums up what it is like to live in Edinburgh at the moment. Thanks.

As I write, the badge competition has just got a whole lot tighter. Make sure you get your entry in! It seems we all need a little pat on the back sometimes ...

Result!

Well, the election is over. The SNP won by one seat. To the unaware amongst you (i.e. foreigners), they are the nationalist party who's aim is an independent Scotland. So Matthew came round to help me pack my bags in case I got thrown out with all the other Sassenachs. My team didn't win my seat. I voted for the Liberal Democrat candidate because she's 39 weeks pregnant and I thought it would have been fun if she'd given birth during the declaration with all the excitement. She didn't.

There were a lot of spoiled ballot papers apparently, because it was so complicated. I'm looking forward to seeing the statistics of spoiled papers divided by total papers, so we can work out the thickest constituency.

Elections

Elections tomorrow. Two ballot papers; three votes; two crosses and the numbers one to four. If I'm confused (32 year old graduate) just think how the grannies feel! I have to go to the local primary school, which I'm more excited about than actually voting as I might get a sneak peak at the nature table.

So who to vote for?

When I lived in Leeds during a general election, Mo Mowlam came round and sat in our kitchen and chatted to us and then had a look in Kate's bedroom (remember that Kate? "It's very messy"). No-one has come round to ask for my vote this time, which is a shame as I have been ready with questions. I do not want the SNP in government as I'm scared that they will make me leave Scotland. I am also very intimidated by Nicola Sturgeon and her scary fringe. (She's not on the political fringe, she has a scary fringe as in haircut.) It's difficult to engage with a single issue party if their issue is as big as "dissolve the United Kingdom". If I vote Lib Dems then the SNP will get in (although they have the best manifesto, with a landscape format and big, clear writing and helpful summaries). If I vote Labour I will have an immediate conscience crisis. Although when I lived in London I lived on the same street as Neil Kinnock's daughter and I like Gordon Brown because he always remembers to send a Christmas card to my boss (who looked after his sick baby). But he's not in this election. It's very difficult. So I've decided to use a cunning test.

Who would Kevin McCloud vote for?

Cross cultural conflict

Maybe, like me, you have been gently seething inside over the row about the Pope's comments. In that case you might find Kester's blog post, and the resulting discussion both interesting and enlightening. Or you may just like to revisit yesterday's post about ferrets. Whatever.

Cable car crash

I hate cable cars. This is my worst nightmare. I remember an awful old rickety cable car in France that had a display outside the machine room showing photos from a fire that had destroyed the system the previous season. Only this display was at the top of the mountain - not the bottom, so you saw it when you got out of the car having already endured the journey! The display said ... "the cable car was rebuilt in a record time of three months". Excuse me, but there's no need to go for a record. I'd feel much happier if they had taken their time and written "this cable car was rebuilt really slowly and carefully, stopping for reflective pauses to make sure everything was okay".

Cabbie in way over his head

You might have heard about this at the weekend - the London cab driver accidentally mistaken for an internet music expert on BBC News 24. The full interview is here. Check out the expression on his face! (I thought he did really well.)

Falling

Kester, a maths teacher and author with great taste in music (who I met when I lived in London), has written a very moving and beautiful reflection (here) in response to a recent TV documentary about the Twin Towers.  It's worth a read, as is the rest of his blog if you can cope with the contemporary mix of Emerging Christianity and the Mr. Men.