ianbee: this is instead of getting a dog

Key to a short cut

BIg day this week. I took delivery of a long awaited key, that will enable me to slip out of the side gate, thus saving me many unnecessary meters of walking. I have drawn a diagram to help you understand fully ...

The red line shows the usual path I am forced to walk. The blue line shows my new, shorter route, which cuts through a passage-way and a locked gate. It saves at least twenty seconds! Thirty if I am dawdling, or carrying something heavy. Added up over the course of a year, I reckon to have gained an extra five hours! That is worth celebrating.

For too long I have stealthily shadowed neighbours as they go through the gate, only to be humiliated as it slams in my face.

No more will I be seen forlornly shaking it in the hope that it has been carelessly left open.

No longer do I suffer the indignity of the long walk. I have a key, and I will be using it.

And occasionally I will show charity and leave the gate slightly ajar, so others without the means to open it may feel blessed.

 

 

Local horse and a heckle

This is my local horse. He (?she) lives a hundred yards from me, in the opposite direction to the ducks and the cockerel. He looks happy enough. He has a chain though, which bothers me slightly. Although that's only when he's out of his field. And he always seems to be chained up in a different spot. So that's okay. Isn't it?

I went to an acoustic gig on Sunday night. Very mellow, three singer-songwriters avoiding the heat in an air-conditioned basement club. One announced his new song - "It's about a dripping tap ..." Quick as a flash, the guy sitting next to me yelled back "Do you want me to give it a plug?"

Genius.

I promised some photos for the Australians

I'm standing at the back of my building, looking down the stream that flows under my bedroom. Everyone in the UK lives in a flat like this, it's standard.

There's a duck pond to one side. I'm so urban that everytime i hear the quacking I assume it's someone's iPhone alarm.

The path to the shops. And the bus. I lingered here this morning because someone had their window open and I could smell bacon.

Back from the shops. It's called a "Bear's Claw". Grrrrr ...

Parsnips. You have them too, but they're nicer over here. I dug these up myself from my friend's allotment. With permission.

Beautiful hills, a big nibbly thing and a boat

I drove back to Leeds from Edinburgh today. The hills were so beautiful in the evening light.

Earlier in the week I stopped off at Moffat and tried to use the loo. The public toilets had a sign on them that said "Mon to Fri, opening times 9:00am to 3:57pm"

For fans of my Edinburgh flat, there was a big nibbly machine nibbling away at the brewery. That's a good job. Right up there alongside snowplow driver.

There was also a building taking shape by the canal. It looks remarkably like a big canal boat, on dry land.

 

 

I'm wondering if I should have got the train

That's my car. It's not going anywhere fast.

That boat isn't either.

Thumped by the canal

I finished the new Ian Rankin novel the other day. Doors Open is his first non-Rebus book but he continues to portray the grimy criminal underside of Edinburgh with relish. I was enjoying it right up to the bit where someone gets mugged outside my flat at the end of the canal. But it was a targeted hit, so I'm probably safe.

Looking for the right person ...

Dear friends (apologies if you also received this by email)

I am going to australia for a year. I might have mentioned it, if i haven't i apologise, i didn't want you to find out like this. Give me a call.

So I thought it would be nice to have someone living in my flat while I am gone. Someone reliable, with no previous history of arson. Someone who will see that things get fixed if they break and someone who will open my post and decide what's important. Really I'm looking for a PA rather than a tenant.

Are you that person? Do you know that person? Have you seen that person from a distance crossing the road?

The price depends on the person. Ideally it would be someone I know, and the rent would be substantially cheaper than the equivalent commercial rent. In return I would get peace-of-mind on the other side of the world, and be able to leave a few boxes of stuff hidden in cupboards (not too much, don't worry!)

Realistically the flat is a lovely size for one person, although two will fit in at a push. Dave & Nicola and James & Beccie tried this for a year each when I worked in London, and both couples remain happily married. This flat brings people together.

It'll probably be available in May, although a later start for the right person/people would be fine as my parents are looking for a short spring break in Scotland!

You probably know the flat already, but if you don't it is a one bedroom property by the canal in Bruntsfield, although you would call it Fountainbridge if anyone really knew where that was. It is on the top floor and has amazing views of Arthur's Seat, the Fife hills and general canal life. It is by the little bridge that goes up and down. Alec, the bloke who looks after the canal is very friendly and says hi every day. In the summer you can see the tattoo fireworks from bed.

Other key plus points:

double glazing
wooden floors
nice neighbours
secure stairwell
recently redecorated kitchen/bathroom/bedroom
heated towel rail!
quiet road
great sofa
comfy bed
can still see the telly from the loo if you leave all the doors open

Negatives:

the occasional mouse in the summer
toilet cistern takes ages to refill

Please get in touch to chat if you think you can help,

Thanks, Ian

A very difficult job

It's a cold day today. I had to wear so many layers to go outside I had difficulty bending my arms at the elbows. I went to the gym and spoke to three people! the challenge will be to see if they come back ...

Looking out of my window, there is a man with a very difficult job. There's not a camera angle that does it justice, but he is level with my window, and I am on the 3rd floor. He's chopping the tree down around himself and I cannot work out how he is attached!

 

I can see clearly now

The new window is here.

You'll be pleased to know that the stairwell is now better insulated than most of our flats.

Drama!

I arrived home from work yesterday to find the window at the top of the stair well was hanging off. Some of the wood was rotten and had just disintegrated. I was concerned. Something had to be done as there was a possibility that the next person to ring the door-bell would get a pane of glass in their head. Ouch.

I rallied the neighbours and we made a plan. One of the girls got very over excited and had to be sent back to her flat, but the local podiatrist was very helpful.

He climbed our ladder, and wearing lots of padding and safety glasses bashed out the glass above his head with a hammer. It was my job to stand in the street and stop the traffic. There wasn't actually any traffic, but I did scare off a girl who was about to walk down the road by shouting and waving my arms. I'd put two wheelie bins in front of the nearest parked car as a barrier to any stray shards, which turned out to be an excellent idea as one piece landed straight in front of them!

The noise was amazing! As we were sweeping up we had curious visitors from down the road popping by to see what was going on, expecting at the very least a burglary or a car crash.